By Published On: June 19, 20220 Comments
Searching in sorrow
In my weakness I found
The path I had taken
Was not at all sound.
The road to success
The way to great gain
Left something inside me
That gave me great pain.
I’d had thrills and then vict’ries…
Success with great grace
But deep in my heart
I was drowned in disgrace.
A voice from within me
From deep down inside,
Cried in my deep sorrow
In my anxious-pained tide.
Seems all I had done
Was soon to be gone
The honor, the glory,
Would all be undone.
“I’ve got nothing,” I thought,
“I got nothing at all.
Unless I have something
That remains when I fall.”
“What have I done…
Was it really so good?
Gave all of that effort…
But empty I stood.”
“What was the purpose?”
Was all I could say
When all of my victories
Had been taken away.
My heart and life broken
I called to my Lord,
Deep in that darkness,
There were only His words,
“What have you done, child?”
He asked me point-blank.
I, stared…and then stuttered
And how my heart sank!
Again He addressed me
E’en there as I cried,
“I’ve called you and loved you
It was for you that I died.”
He picked up my head,
And I raised up my eyes,
And there in my weakness,
I gave my reply,
“My strength was my weakness,
But the worst thing of all
Was that it was my strength
That caused my great fall.”
“Forgive what I’ve done, Lord
And how I’ve decried
The reason You called me
Which I so long had denied.”
He showed me His cross,
His wounds and His side,
He said it again…
“It was for you that I died.”
The love that I’d sought for
The feeling inside,
Somehow–strangely grew warmer,
As a part of me died.
A New Man within me,
Renewed from the pain
Now looked up to Jesus
His strength to obtain.
“I’ll do what you want, Lord,
It’s all that I have!
My wants, my desires,
All those I will leave.”
“Show me Your way, Lord,
Show me Your call,
That for which I was chosen
Before the beginning of all.”
“Go–now–in your weakness,
Don’t trust in your strength,
Though weak, tired and weary
I’ll hold you the length.”
I rose and then followed
To where…I don’t know.
But trusting and waiting,
In time He will show
What things really matter,
What things to forsake,
And why He has called me
How He gave me His grace.
I’m clay… but He’ll shape me
He’ll be by my side.
My Friend, Lord and Shepherd,
In whom I’ll confide.
I praise Him! He changed me!
My weakness He raised
To strength so unequalled–
He’ll ever be praised!
My searching’s now over
And now that I’ve been
Called His–and forgiven
No more need I gain.

Thomas F. Fischer

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